The drooping Israeli flags were as numerous, unmoving, and lifeless in the desert heat as the Israeli police and military conscripts blocking people from their basic rights. One of those young Israeli conscripts at the "immigration window", obviously not enjoying her work and trying to make it as hard as possible for Palestinians and visitors, asked do I have another passport.. yes... here it is a US passport. She kept my Palestinian document (called a passport but really not a passport and issued only via approval by Israeli officials) and asked gruffly "Istana" (=wait) and "roh henak" (go there).

But on the window nearby for Palestinians from Jerusalem (blue ID card) there was an even more problematic women: a lunatic Israeli who was literally screaming at the top of her lungs to the line of Palestinians who tried to figure out what to do to get her to calm down and process their documents. We wait, some for one hour some for four or more (and some are denied entry to their own homeland). Mine was a tolerable 3 hours until they called my name; this I think relate to having US Citizenship and thus pushing us around is thought to make us decide not to stay or even visit. The wait gave me time to chat with fellow travelers/sufferers and to begin to jot these notes and reflect on the day's progress and to think about other things.

The day had started at 4:30 AM in Amman and we were lined up in cars at the Jordanian side of the border at about 6 AM as the morning sun rose strong over the hills in this lowest place on earth near the dead sea. Swarming hungry flies got thicker as the line of cars inched its way amid the restless children and smoking drivers. 

Our Amman driver (Hanna) was an old veteran at this and simply let his tape recorder play the songs of George Wasuf , songs that seem to defy reality of the crossing point to the hell of the occupied territories. Lyrics of "Lissa Elhaya 7ilwa" (Life is still beautiful) and "life is short, the fortune is fate". Hanna is a Palestinian Christian who has not been back to Palestine since 1967 when he as a child and his family were in Jordan as Israeli strolled through the West Bank and then prevented those who were abroad from returning. He has four children. He was not shy to express his dismay at how Palestine was invaded (by British and Zionist colonial powers), betrayed (by Arab leaders), ignored (by the rest of the world), and maligned (in Zionist controlled media). But he has retained rays of hope as he talks about his children who did find jobs, about his dream of visiting Beit Lahem...

After the checks on the Jordan side, we are loaded onto crowded buses and then move to the Bridge area and wait in a line of buses. Images flash before my mind: a girl with torn shoes, a newborn being shielded from the flies by a vigilant mother, a women with a patch on her eye, a man on crutches, pilgrims coming back from Saudi Arabia carrying "holy water". Most are very poor but there are a few wealthier folks (some zipped us by in the VIP shuttles).

The hardest parts were from 6 AM when we got into the Jordan bridge to 2:30 PM when we were still languishing at the Israeli terminal. Hundreds of Palestinians, more than 70% women and children wait patiently to be bossed around. We witness acts of Israeli insensitivity (e.g. when the young conscript demands children be lifted for her to see them rather than simply lean over the look at them), we witness small acts of treachery (e.g. a Palestinian man cutting in front of old women and children), but we witness more acts of compassion and kindness (offering drinks, food, helping each other with luggage etc). 

In between periods of waiting, there are periods of frantic dash to get luggage load it onto one or another bus. I missed two buses as I decided I was not in such a rush and I should help others get onto it. In going from Amman to Beit Sahour, we passed through the following areas of authority (each with checkpoints): Jordanian, Israeli, Palestinian, Israeli, then Palestinian again (the latter four are to pass from the Jericho ghetto/reservation to the Bethlehem Ghetto/reservation). The 11 hour ordeal for what should be a two hour trip is rather exhausting. Maybe they aught to make it an olympic marathon sport! 

The apartheid system here is mean and people are being forced to worry more about their food than their freedom (of course they are directly related). But the apartheid system is not sustainable and even Israelis know it. It is the manner of its demise that we should start discussing (e.g. changing the concepts of nationalism to concepts of citizenship and equality). These are things I began to discuss and I find many interested. The conversations are fascinating, the people eminently interested (as well as complex). A friend who just spent the summer here wrote "the situation is so inhumane...How do we bring awareness to what occupation does to the lives of people..How do we get folks to to get it..this in the year 2008--it should not be allowed for one group of people to lawfully be able to murder, maim, torture, demolish homes, confiscate lands...Among the things we witnessed; we sat with the families in Sheik Jarrah.. once again, how can it be that settlers can come and kick the familes out of their homes ..and then arrest the owner..how can it be that Israel can just demolish the Al Kurd home in front of their eyes and those of the community family... then to impose such high taxes..that are nearly impossible for anyone to pay.. It reminds me of the gentrifcation happening in US cities where African Americans and the poor are being pushed out of their homes. I have so much respect for the ISM volunteers and others who are steadfast with the families...yes, a human shield...We saw so much oppression,children so defiant..after visiting a sibling in prison, or daughter not able to see her father for seven years --because he lives in Gaza and she lives in the West Bank..this is Bullshit!"

I do have to watch that I do nor waste time on negative thoughts. I did wonder briefly if people like Palestinian "negotiator" Saeb Erekat goes through the border hassles or cares about the suffering of ordinary Palestinians. I did wonder briefly about many in the "left" in the US who offer lip service to the suffering Palestinians while unwilling to really challenge the Israel lobby grip on US foreign policy. I wondered about Israeli transcripts some younger than my son who rule over millions of what they consider children of a lesser God at best or subhuman at worst. I wondered about collaborators and profiteers. I have to quickly shake off these negative thoughts to focus on actions since reality is far more interesting and there is far more goodness around as well as possibilities for good work (already I witnessed several acts of selfless giving). There are other things. I am glad that a child at the barber shop in Beit Sahour getting his first haircut seem to take more of my thought. A discussion of what to do with too many grapes in the garden far more interesting. Talk about actions to reduce solid waste and recycling far more exciting. Talk about what to with the liberated hill Ush Ghrab that is still under threat in Beit Sahour (see IMEMC video of the chronicle of this struggle and the inspiring message of resistance at <http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9ZaFwi6WBo>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9ZaFwi6WBo )...

So "joyful participation in the sorrows of this world" work is plentiful; come visit us. As we say in Arabic: Ahlan wa sahlan. 

Indeed the George Wasuf song is correct that "Life is still beautiful".

PS: thanks to the hundreds among you who have written personal letters to me about this move. My apologies if I did not answer everyone personally. I am trying to catch up.